I have been trying to focus only on the positive lately because I want to embrace this new chapter. I want to make this little apartment my own and enjoy a bit of stability. I am honestly so thankful that I have made it this far. If I knew it would be this "easy", I wouldn't have worried so much in the beginning. It's not easy emotionally or mentally, but I really thought I would struggle much more than I have. Albeit I have my moments. I have moments when I think of the holidays coming up and how I won't be experiencing them married. I have moments when I see a newborn baby being coddled in public by it's young parents. I thought by now I would have children, a family, a solid marriage, but I don't. These are things I have to learn to accept everyday.
I don't get jealous of those who have those things, but every life expectation I've had the last three years or so has been shattered. I can't explain the pain unless you've experienced it yourself. It's a different kind of loss. I tried not to make this blog about my experiences as a divorcee, but I have to be honest in saying that this is where my life is right now. I hope to bring some comfort to those who may feel the same way I do, and encourage others to be grateful for what they have. Too much of our lives are spent taking life for granted. I hope to never do so again.
I don't want to end this post on a low note, but maybe it's the rain lulling my brain to sleep. Either way, I will be moving for the next three days and I will be back soon to share some pictures of the place all dolled up!