Just a quick post!

Pick up this March desktop background at Sweet Tea Paperie! It feels so spring--like and I love the Hunter style rain boots!

Happy (fourth day of ) March!

LIVING ALONE MEANS...

Living alone is not something I ever planned on. I honestly have never done it before until after my divorce. The closest I came to living alone was having my own dorm room in college. Even then I was surrounded by close to 20 other girls.

Now that I am living alone for the first time in my young adult life, I thought I'd embrace the experience. There are some perks to living alone and I think for the most part I enjoy it. It does get lonely and there are times I would like to walk into my living room and talk to a person face-to-face, but for now, phone calls and FaceTime will just have to do.

Here are some of my favorite things of living alone. Maybe you can relate...

1. Cooking for myself. I usually enjoy cooking and it's nice to cook what I want. It's also nice to eat dinner on the living room couch occasionally...

2. My own flexible cleaning schedule. I love to come home (and wake up) to a tidy apartment. I have my own little cleaning schedule, however I can change it up whenever I want to.

3. Some serious privacy. No longer do I share my space with another have to keep things "ladylike". I just like to let it hang out, ya know?

4. Lots of time to think...and practice my winning argument skills.

5. Decorating for myself is awesome. I can choose how I want to decorate. I don't care if it looks like actual estrogen took up residence in my apartment...

I still do this though....

100 POSTS

Well, this blog has hit over 105 posts since its debut in August of 2013. I cannot even believe the months (and posts) have flown by so quickly. On occasion I will scroll to past posts read my thoughts and look at the pictures I've chosen to put those thoughts on display. A couple of posts had me going "What was I thinking?" (in a good way), while others made me chuckle. It's amazing what we find important in this life. Things that were once important seem trivial now.

I would say that is how life has been for me. The past few months I have been blogging here have been eye opening. I think going through something painful makes me more grateful for the things I have, and the people in my life I have to share them with. I definitely think more changes are to come in the next few weeks, months, and years. Even if this blog turns out to be nothing more than sharing those things with you, then I am fine with that!

Here's too 100, 1,000, 100,000 more posts!

FROM THE HEART

photo edited with the Waterlogue app

I like to write posts that kind of feel like we are in the room talking to each other. These are like my "coffee date" posts. I just have the need to share what's on my heart and type them out. I haven't blogged since Valentine's Day and for good reason.

I think Valentine's Day hit me pretty hard this year. I was also sick that day, which made it no bueno. I had plans to travel to my sister and brother in law's new house on a base they were just recently stationed. I was excited. I was also relieved I had something to do on Valentine's Day that included my favorite people - my family. Time with them sometimes helps me forget the other not-so-good things in my life. The day just brought up a lot of old feelings. The sadness, anger, and confusion all welled up inside of me.

I also tried to stay off social media as much as I could. Ya know, the flowers, the candy, the sweet little photos of couples...It was getting to be a little too much. I wondered throughout the day, why my life had changed so drastically while other couples were blissfully celebrating. What had I done wrong? What was I missing? The truth is, you can't really compare your life to that of someone else's. No one said, "Thou must have a date on Valentine's Day", so why did I feel like I was missing out? Here's why:

I was reminded once again that I was alone.

Now, don't run and hand me a box of tissues. I am okay. I have had my chance at love, and I don't regret that. What I do regret is the pressure I have put on myself to have someone new - "to move on, get over it, find someone else". Why have I beat myself up over "still" being single? It's not like it's been years. It's been 9 months. Nine! A friend of mine and I were having a conversation about singleness and being in our 20s. Our singleness is different, but we are single all the same. I am starting over, while she is starting out. Your 20s is the time to take advantage. I know I have said that before, but it really hit me today. What am I doing with my time? Am I wasting it, or am I taking every opportunity to set the tone for the rest of my life?

I think I may take some time to really evaluate where I am and where I want to go in my life. There is so much pressure to have everything figured out. It's a constant hurry up and wait scenario. I think the 20-somethings out there can agree that early adulthood is a trying time. So much changes, yet I feel like my body and mind are at odds with each other. Some days I still feel 17. There's constant questioning and wondering, "Will my career ever take off? Where do I want to live? Should I continue my education? Where can I meet people? What skills/training should I pursue? Am I ready to settle down? I want to travel, but how do I come up with the resources? Am I spending too much? Should I be saving more? Will I have anything to spare to create savings? Will my student loans ever be paid off?" See what I mean? And all of this even without relationship troubles to think about!

All of this is just bouncing around in my brain at all hours of the day. I say all of this to say, no I do not have it figured out. Who does?

If you or someone you know does have it figured out, tell them to shoot me an email! 

BLOG SURVEY

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HOW I GET THROUGH

I have been through plenty of things and one of the things that really helped me get through was journaling. I thought it was important that I have a way to express everything I was feeling.

One night I decided to write a letter to myself. Basically, I was telling myself to get my shit together. Here's an excerpt from it. I hope it inspires you in some way. If not, it's still pretty, right?

BACK IN THE DAY: COLLEGE

I love to reminisce. I am one of those sentimental people that just thinks about good times from my past and reflects on why they were good.

One of my most favorite times in my life was while I was attending college for my undergrad. Out of high school I had no desire to move away to attend school, and I honestly wasn't 100% sure what I wanted to do with my life. I still don't really know, if we are being honest here. There was a junior college about 40 minutes away from my house and I decided to pursue my Associate's degree until I decided to settle on a major. The junior college was easy to apply to and I could still work and earn some money while attending classes a few times a week. At the time I worked at Chick-Fil-A and I knew my managers would be flexible with my schedule since they knew I was in school.

The first three years (I decided not to attend summer courses) were spent pursuing my Associate's degree in Psychology. I went a few days a week (everyday one semester) and I made some pretty good friends there. After my Associate's degree was complete, I began scrambling to find a 4 year college/university to attend in the Atlanta area. I began researching and I applied to a few schools, but because of working so much (and a couple of significant others), my GPA wasn't what I had hoped, so my options were pretty small. I was browsing online when I saw an ad for Atlanta Christian College. I decided to read thoroughly through the website and I immediately decided to start the application process. I gathered all of the documents I needed to fill out, requested my transcripts, and sent them in. Long story short I was accepted and I began to prepare for my arrival there in the fall.

My first goal was to lose some weight I had put on after quitting cheering and working at Chick-Fil-A. I lost 30 pounds that summer on Jenny Craig and I began to feel confident in myself. I was terrified to live away from home, but at 21 years old, I knew it was time. All of my friends were supportive, but my life was about to change in a big way. When I arrived to the campus, it was small and it felt like living at summer camp. The dorms were somewhat outdated, but to me, it gave it some charm.

I met some amazing girls at school (guys too) and I really experienced true community. There were some late nights, hard tests, fulfilling classes, and athletic games. The best part was that the college was Christian and I dove into my biblical studies minor. I never heard the Bible explained to me in that way before. Everything seemed to make sense.

I also had my fair share of social drama. That part I won't get into, because honestly, it's all insignificant now. I definitely grew up there, learned to live on my own, and set priorities. It even led to my first job right out of college. My college experience will always have a special place in my heart and I will always appreciate the learning opportunities I had there.

What was your college experience like? Like it or hate it?

WE'RE ALL WEIRDOS

The term "normal" has always bothered me. I studied psychology and counseling in school, so the more I read the more I realized there is a very fine light between what's normal and weird. I think we all have quirks and weird things that make us unique. We are who we are because of our behaviors and tendencies.

Today I wanted to share some of mine so we can all feel like "weirdos" together. P.S. Some aren't as weird as others, but just bear with me. You all know I love a good list...

01. I always check behind the shower curtain before I do my "business" in the bathroom (even at someone else's house). Even now that I live alone, I still do it.
02. I am slightly OCD when it comes to my office. If someone moves something it bothers me until I move it back. 
03. I do not like dishes in my sink ever. I always make sure they are in the dishwasher before I go to bed or I can't sleep.
04. I pin a lot of crafts on Pinterest even though I have never attempted any of them.
05. I generally wake up with a song stuck in my head every morning. I think I listen to music a little too much.
06. I could watch "You've Got Mail" 1,000 times and still never get sick of it.
07. I cannot eat fish. I have tried several times and I just can't stomach it. I love shrimp though.
08. I get annoyed really easily by inconsiderate people, yet I rarely say anything to them to their face. One of these days if someone treats me with disrespect I will actually call them out on it. No one deserves to be cut in front of in line, or have their kid run circles around them in the store. It's just rude.
09. I am kind of a loner, but in small doses. Sometimes I get lonely, but I am typically more comfortable doing things myself.
10. I get really uncomfortable around conflict, yelling, or fighting. Sometimes it will even make me physically sick to witness a fight. I crave peace. It doesn't bother me when I am involved in the conflict though (depending on what it's about, of course).

See? These aren't totally weird things, but we all have something...

PEEK INTO MY PURSE

I have not done this post before. At least I don't remember it, so I thought I would show you what's in my bag.

Can you handle it? You are about to be blown away, or put to sleep depending on how you look at it...

01. Notebook & pen: This notebook I got as a gift from a V-Day exchange this past year. I take it with me everywhere and jot notes down when needed. Usually they are blog ideas.
02. Wallet: This is a must obviously. I have all of debit/credit cards, insurance cards, money, license. The boring usual and not worth opening up for. I do have a thing for keeping receipts in my wallet. It's a bad habit.
03. Gum: Orbit Spearmint. It's the best flavor in my opinion.
04. You see a little Target card there dontcha? Yeah...
05. Apple Earpods: You never know when you may need a little escape.
06. Simplified Planner: I am making it a point to take this thing everywhere. The more I have it, the more I can utilize it.
07. Eyeglass Case: This is Vera Bradley and since my glasses broke this past year I guess I am just keeping in there for when I do buy glasses.
08. Medium Cosmetic: This is also Vera Bradley and I stole it from my sister. I keep tampons, lip gloss, make up sometimes, Advil, the ush.

I hope you enjoyed seeing inside my bag. I think I just officially became a blogger.

You're welcome. 

BLACK FRIDAY

I am not a big proponent of Black Friday, but I say if you can do it from home and not have to venture out, go for it!

As you may or may not know I am a Mary Kay Independent Beauty Consultant, and I am offering a Black Friday Sale this coming Friday (Nov. 29) starting at 6 a.m. There will be a 10% discount on all orders (excluding the items listed below) until 11 p.m., and free shipping on orders of $50 or more! To get your 10% discount you may place an order on my site (www.marykay.com/mbarrett7150). Be sure to add coupon code BLACKFRIDAY in the notes section of your order.

The items below will be offered at a deeper discount. These items are in stock and can ship immediately! A surprise discount between 15% and 30% will be offered on November 29 starting at 6 a.m. The earlier you shop the more you save! You will receive the discount upon processing of payment.
(prices below do not include SURPRISE discount or taxes + shipping).

Mary Kay TimeWise Age Fighting Moisturizer (Normal to Dry Skin): $24
Mary Kay TimeWise 3-in-1 Cleansing Bar (Normal, Combination, & Oily Skin): $20
Mary Kay Lash Love Lengthening Mascara (I Love Brown): $15
Mary Kay Cream & Sugar Lipgloss: $14
Mary Kay Subtle Tanning Lotion: $17
I have two Botanicals Sets (cleanse, hydrate, freshen) for Normal/Sensitive and Dry/Sensitive Skin: $44 

In order to receive the SURPRISE discount you will need to place an order by email at mbarrett7150@marykay.com or Facebook. I will also be available for any questions you may have about products! 

Have a very Happy Thanksgiving and I will see you bright and early Friday morning! 

WISHLIST

I don't normally create "Christmas Lists" so to speak, but this year I wanted to see how far I could stretch my Pinterest organization skills. These items were chosen for my eyes only, but I thought I might as well share. What's the point of a blog after all?

 You can see the source of all images by going to my Pinterest board {w i s h l i s t}.

 What is on your wishlist this year?

"I AM A GREAT FRIEND..."

Today I am in the mood to get real. Really real. If this isn't the kind of stuff you like to read, please move onto the next blog. It's going to get cah-razy.

Well not so much, but I do feel like I have some things to get off of my chest. Again, I didn't want to make this blog all about my failed marriage, but I feel like some wisdom has come from my experience. I think those who have experienced divorce know a thing or two about marriage.

I was thinking the other night about relationships and I have been reading articles about marriage, and things that I want to remember for the next time (I hope there's a next time). One thing that stuck out to me was when my ex-husband said, "You know...I am a really good friend, but I am not a good husband..." Wow. That spoke so much in so few words.

My first reaction to this was sadness. I thought to myself, "Why does it have to be either friend or husband? Aren't both equally important"? Isn't friendship one of the most important aspects of a good, healthy marriage? I think it is. My second reaction was utter anger. I felt angry because I hadn't seen this "good friend" in quite some time. I hadn't felt like I was living with a good friend, let alone married to one. Good friends are honest, thoughtful, caring, and self-less. These are the qualities I think of when I think of a good friend. These are qualities I would hope my friends would say about me.

I don't in any way want to say that my husband was a bad person. To me, good people do bad things and vice versa. I do want to say that for the most part, good friends are good wives and good husbands- if they choose to be. Here's a quote from an article I read online and it really struck home with me...

"BE SILLY… don’t take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier." Read article here.

This speaks volumes when it comes to marital friendship. Friends laugh, do fun things together, and enjoy each other. Last I checked, friendship wasn't all work and no play. Friends make things light and I think your spouse should be able to do that also! As it says, "Don't take yourself so damn seriously." I 100% agree.

FALL Y'ALL

source

Well, it's a little rainy in these parts today friends. This is the start of a wonderful weekend though. I am moving (once again) and I am thankful for mid 60s temps and sunny weather heading my way. Did I mention I am moving? For the 6th time in three years? Yeah, I am kind of over moving. Luckily, I am moving to a smaller unit in the same complex so it shouldn't be that bad. Every time I move I get a little sad. This time is a little different because I will be making the move alone for the first time. It's bittersweet to be honest. I am glad to be moving out of the last place I lived married, but I am nervous to be leaving what I've known only as a married woman. Divorce brings about all kinds of changes, which tends to bring up some anxiety.

I have been trying to focus only on the positive lately because I want to embrace this new chapter. I want to make this little apartment my own and enjoy a bit of stability. I am honestly so thankful that I have made it this far. If I knew it would be this "easy", I wouldn't have worried so much in the beginning. It's not easy emotionally or mentally, but I really thought I would struggle much more than I have. Albeit I have my moments. I have moments when I think of the holidays coming up and how I won't be experiencing them married. I have moments when I see a newborn baby being coddled in public by it's young parents. I thought by now I would have children, a family, a solid marriage, but I don't. These are things I have to learn to accept everyday.

I don't get jealous of those who have those things, but every life expectation I've had the last three years or so has been shattered. I can't explain the pain unless you've experienced it yourself. It's a different kind of loss. I tried not to make this blog about my experiences as a divorcee, but I have to be honest in saying that this is where my life is right now. I hope to bring some comfort to those who may feel the same way I do, and encourage others to be grateful for what they have. Too much of our lives are spent taking life for granted. I hope to never do so again.

I don't want to end this post on a low note, but maybe it's the rain lulling my brain to sleep. Either way, I will be moving for the next three days and I will be back soon to share some pictures of the place all dolled up!

Happy Friday!

TENSION

Dating. Relationships. Marriage.  

As a teenager I was taught from all of the angles about dating, relationships, and marriage. The truth is, I have had my fair share of dating blunders and busts. Most of which I regret. I acted selfishly, stubbornly, impulsively, and thought very little about how that would impact my future married life. I have always dated with marriage as my end game. That can be both a good and bad thing. It's good because it can give dating a purpose. It's bad because it puts unnecessary pressure on a couple. Not every dating couple is meant to be married. Does this mean all dating outside of the person you marry is pointless? No. But it can be detrimental to your future husband or wife (I say wife for all the guys who read this...None? Okay).

Now, I can only speak for my own dating experience. Shockingly, my dating journey is starting over. I am now dating as an adult. But what the heck does that mean? Does any of what I learned as a teenager apply now? I hope so. It's really all I have to go off now.

The Bible does not speak of dating. It does not offer a 'Ten Commandments for Non-Married People'. During the Biblical days, dating didn't exist yet. Marriages were arranged. Marriages also occurred between family members. Yuck. Now, there are more options than ever. You can literally walk into a coffee shop and meet the love of your life. You can also go online and you're among millions on various dating sites. How does one navigate through this giant world full of members of the opposite sex? How does one deal with the new-found pressures of dating?

As a teenage girl I was told, "boys call, boys pick girls up, and boys pay"...But now, you could be asked out by a guy and you really aren't sure if he just asked you on a date or not...The lines are now blurred between potential friend and date. It's confusing. It's frustrating. I am more of an old-fashioned girl when it comes to dating. I do not just randomly give my number to a guy (okay, once). I do not just ask a guy out that I find attractive. I also do not call a guy first (maybe a few times). Is this sounding very "He Just Not That Into You" right now? Maybe I should watch that movie again...

"Oh Jenny. Oh, Jenny, Jenny, Jenny. Oh, my Jenny. Wait, what number did I just call?"

I say all of that to say this. I have no idea what I am doing anymore. I don't think I have ever really known come to think of it. Am I alone here? I am not saying I am looking for a relationship right now, but I think it's important that I set some boundaries now for when the time comes. I definitely want to preserve as much of my heart as I can, while I still have some left. Dating can bring about all kinds of complications. The best thing for me is to have things be as simple as possible. Please tell me things are still simple out there...

If not, I am staying single forever. Okay, maybe not forever.

WEEKEND

I usually try and take it easy during the weekends. This weekend was no exception. I literally stayed in my pajamas all day watching movies, a little football, eating goodies, and planning my week (read: month) ahead. I tried Pillsbury's Gluten Free Cookie Dough. It tasted just like the gluten filled stuff, so that's a win in my book. I also was able to enjoy cooler weather and break out a scarf without having to deal with the mid-day sweat fest. I think Fall has officially hit the South, so I am excited! Just in time for Halloween in a couple of weeks! I also made some amaze-balls French toast on Saturday morning. I added brown sugar and nutmeg to the batter, which was divine. Also, add lots and lots of coffee and you have the perfect weekend!

how was your weekend? 

+follow me on Instagram to see all of my pics from the weekend. 

SATURDAY

Slouchy Sweater Pant  // Polka Dot Cardigan  // Women's Suede Sherpa Moccasin  // Women's Jersey Tee Hoodies // Women's Lounge Pants

I love weekends. I love watching movies, cooking, cleaning, relaxing, blogging, etc. What are your favorite weekend plans?

BLOG TRENDS

With blogging there has definitely been a transformation from when I first started to where I am today. When I first starting blogging, I only wrote posts. There may have been a photo included here and there, but the main drive behind the blog was my content. I am striving to keep that portion of blogging alive on this blog, but people are inspired by what they see. Visual stimulation is important within the arena of social media.

I have seen some major trends come to life in the blogging community.

Now, blogs have become more aesthetically pleasing to the eye. I for one enjoy looking at beautiful photos while I read blog content. I want to see what you are saying come to life. Now more than ever, with the help of Pinterest, photos become a road map of the blogging journey. I will see hundreds of photos related to blogs and blog content. It's amazing to me how we bloggers can still come up with words to write and pictures to post. You would think by now, I would be reading and writing the same posts over and over. With blogging, every blog and blogger is unique. My story looks like no one else's story and vice versa.

I have tried really hard to get involved more with social media. I use Facebook and Pinterest more than any other social media outlet, mainly because Twitter overwhelms me too much. I think I may follow too many people. I get lost in the shuffle and can't seem to integrate myself into the conversation.

Blogging for a purpose has become so prevalent these past few years. Bloggers have been helping others in some amazing ways. I think bloggers have such an influence in our culture. With the flux of our nation's government I have seen bloggers take significant stances when it comes to debt, spending, healthcare, etc. Our world is constantly changing, but bloggers have remained informed and positive. I love reading blogs that uplift, while still remaining truthful. Faith-based blogs have immensely helped me during the last few months. It's what we do in bloggy-land. We help others. Not ever blogger is a vain, self-centered, narcissist. Some actually care about others!

Collaboration is HUGE in blogging. From brands to products, bloggers have great influence on what we buy and sell. I have seen an increase in the number of product reviews the past year or so. I like them, but not every post or every day. I tend to read the ones that interest me, and scroll onward when I see the ones that don't. I think advertising is changing as well. Prankvertising is getting a lot of attention in the media, and I think blogvertising is heading on up as well! Mom bloggers, beauty bloggers, and fashion bloggers are being saturated with brand and product collaborations. They are the items that we buy and use. This is where our world is headed. Rather than commercials -- let's talk about how you use and like the product. Genius.

HOME

living room | white pumpkins | fireplace | tablescape

I love Fall and all that it brings. If I could have it my way, it would be fall year-round. With Fall also comes some redecorating. Above are my favorites to transform a room or rooms. Comfy blankets, white pumpkins, candles, and a fall tablescape complete the looks I love!

What are your Fall decor favorites?
 

Linking up with Kristin + Ashlyn for Four Favorites.

OBSESSED WITH GOLD

source: Glitter Guide

Let's talk about glitter and gold. I am seeing this trend everywhere. I find this photo to be rather inspiring. I think that polka dots have a classic feel and gold gives it a modern twist.

source: The Jew in J.Crew

source: Apartment 34

source: Society6

source: Chloe Rose Boutique

 I think that gold and glitter is so pretty, inspiring, and bold. I enjoy finding items that give a space a little sparkle. I hope this trend is here to stay for a long time.

Are you loving the glitter/gold trend?

Melissa's Merchandise Winner!
If you registered to be my customer on my jewelry site, I have chosen a winner via Random.org. 
If your email address is RBFRIZZELL{at}YAHOO{dot}COM- you have won a $25 to Melissa's Merchandise! Another random winner will be selected soon, so to win free jewelry, register at my online boutique here. As always, thank you to those who've registered!

BLOGGING LIFE

source: Etsy

I have been doing this blogging thing for a number of years. I enjoy it and I appreciate both it's simplicity and it's strive towards community. I enjoy sharing pieces of my life with you and I enjoy the feedback. I was reading a post that sparked something inside of me and made me (once again) evaluate my passion and purpose for blogging.

What is it about blogging that makes my heart go pitter patter? 

Well, in some ways it gives me an outlet. I have so many thoughts that run through my head and so many ideas that it helps to have some place for them to go. Pinterest has also enabled me to get more inspired for this here blog.

Blogging gives me a sense of community. I have found a lot of support from the blogging community since my divorce went public back in May/June. People weren't putting me down or condescending. Everyone was so uplifting and encouraging. It actually helped me to get out of bed some days.

Blogging helps others. I have met some awesome bloggers that really try to make a difference with their blogs. Praying for others, raising funds, helping small business owners, etc. I think with blogging there is another avenue for people to bring awareness to issues and hope to the hopeless.

Blogging offers me a little extra cash. Divorce is expensive and it helps to have a few extra dollars. For the most part this goes to further advertisement of my new blog or to an extra expense that pops up. I work hard for my blog and hard for the money. Even if its $3. I just love blogging that much! It also gives me a way to launch my new business!

I love blogging and all that comes with it. I devote hours each night to my posts and also to growing my new Virtual Studio. That is why I want to help other bloggers be successful. It's in my DNA to problem solve, organize, and mark things off of my and your To Do list.

Why do you love blogging/reading blogs?